my wife and i call in to the cbs/tms/sm once or twice a month and only listen to the announcements.
last week the announcements included a demo of a jw woman trying to peddle mags to a female householder.
her intro went like this:.
para: ROFLMAO! Wish I could have been there.
Thanks for the other replies and wish I could post a proper response to each, but I've got run out the door with my unbaptized son to see if we can find something fun to do in San Francisco today.
Cheers,
om
this is a serious question.. i know people that hear/feel god (and see postings about people's experiences), but i have not experienced this.
i have never heard anything audibly (or otherwise) nor "felt" anything inwardly.. i've prayed, read, quieted my thoughts, etc...but still nothing..
*munching popcorn and wondering how/if relations between the posters on this thread would be if all were together at Lake Tahoe*
starting the week of september 3rd they will cease having local announcement as part of the service meeting.
is there going to be a much reduction of the letters sent to the congregation?
will everyone be expected to read the bulletin board to know what is going on?
Phew!! For a second there I thought we wouldn't be able to keep up with assembly & CO Visit dates by just calling in. It's still the first part of the SM, just smooshed together.
om
wt publications www.strictlygenteel.co.uk.
we are safeguarded by applying gods counsel.
we are safeguarded by applying gods counsel.
Blondie, I've gotten out of the habit of saying Thank You for all your hard work.
So, THANK YOU!!!
At minimum, it's nice to be able to see the topic, the main points and a quick scan of you calling BS all over the place.
om
my wife and i call in to the cbs/tms/sm once or twice a month and only listen to the announcements.
last week the announcements included a demo of a jw woman trying to peddle mags to a female householder.
her intro went like this:.
Clickable now.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ki801ccg9Yo
Thanks wasblind. Good for a 4th of July chuckle.
om
my wife and i call in to the cbs/tms/sm once or twice a month and only listen to the announcements.
last week the announcements included a demo of a jw woman trying to peddle mags to a female householder.
her intro went like this:.
blondie: "He was counseled that he had to be "positive.""
I can remember trying to come up with demos that were more "realistic". E.g. real objections, a bit of verbal reparte' or debate and was told it was too controversial.
Anony Mous: Sounds like you took "controversial" to a new level.
Rocky_Girl: "I was about to go sky diving and I didn't want to miss the plane."
Gotta love working in WT-forbidden extreme sports into your objection.
om
1. have an apostate food truck outside with free burritos and shasta cola.. 2. wear a smurf costume and run across the stage.. 3. bikini car wash across the street.. 4. have an old-school breakdancing session on the corner, cardboard and all.
bonus if you do it on a mat made of watchtowers and primary colored book covers.. 5. have a garage sale or flea market in the neighborhood during the afternoon session.. 6. sit in the audience and applaud everything that anybody says - try to get a standing ovation for each sentence of the closing prayer.. 7. put a recording of rap, heavy metal, or other forbidden music on instead of the kingdom melodies.. 8. get fifty of your friends to walk around in the stadium during the session, holding signs that say, "louder please!
" and "take your shirt off!
This one would take two people to work smoothly, but would definitely be memorable for all in attendance.
About 1 minute before the song starts for the afternoon session the following happens:
Conspirator #1 sits within 100-200 feet of the stage wearing typical MS/Elder apparel. He has the electronic controls set up inside his shoes (ideally) or at minimum held in his lap underneath a jacket.
Conspirator #2 walks into the auditorium casually carrying a picnic bag which actually contains a fairly inexpensive radio-controlled helicopter. He approaches a row of seats near the stage with a good line of sight to Conspirator #1. He sets the RC helicopter on an empty seat and immediately heads for an exit, never to be seen again.
Conspirator #1 is at the ready the whole time. If Joe Attendant notices the helicopter right off the bat and makes a move towards it, Conspirator #1 springs into action. (Or at least his fingertips do.) The helicopter flies up to the top of the speakers on a pole, well out of anyone's reach. Hopefully though, it goes relatively unnoticed. The 'copter stays up there until the best talk to disrupt begins. (Preferably a Bethel speaker or the dreaded "Keynote Address".) Then the copter is flown down to the stage, making one or two passes of the podium before settling down conspicuously on the front part of the stage. If attendants rush the platform to remove it, the copter flies back up to the top of the speakers and waits. If the attendants choose to ignore it, it will lift up and down on the front of the stage every minute or two. Just imagine how interesting this talk would be to all the kids in attendance! The attendants are damned if they do, damned if they don't do anything about it.
om
my wife and i call in to the cbs/tms/sm once or twice a month and only listen to the announcements.
last week the announcements included a demo of a jw woman trying to peddle mags to a female householder.
her intro went like this:.
sooner7nc: "John Q. Householder" LOL. Good luck with that and be sure to let us know if you ever give it a try.
Just little bit off topic: Is the word "householder" just a little bit culty? I told a co-worker that JWs use that word and he thought it sounded a bit strange.
wasblind: HILARIOUS! Especially this part: "Publishers questions takin' from Reasoning from the Scriptures book page 16"
farkel: Sounds like you're in the same kind of mood I was in last night.
I'm reminded of Jack Nicholson's response to the neighbor's Bible thumping cleaning lady in the movie "As Good as it Gets".
"Where do they teach you to talk like this? In some Panama City "Sailor wanna hump-hump" bar, or is it getaway day and your last shot at his whiskey? Sell crazy someplace else, we're all stocked up here."
mrsJones: "just because I may tell a person what my name is doesn't mean they're going to get anywhere with me."
C'mon Josie, I got some swampland to sell you. C'mon Josie, Josie, Josie, Josie, Josie, Josie, Josie, Josie.... Not working?
jwfacts: "What are you selling?"
"Oh we're not selling anything. What we're doing is part of a worldwide Bible education work. If you'd like to make a small donation I'd be happy to accept it."
om
my wife and i call in to the cbs/tms/sm once or twice a month and only listen to the announcements.
last week the announcements included a demo of a jw woman trying to peddle mags to a female householder.
her intro went like this:.
OUTLAW: "What do you want?" LOL!!!
Maybe I was just in a particularly cranky mood when I heard the demo, but my knee-jerk, UNSPOKEN response to "....and yours is?" was this:
"NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS!" Followed by OUTLAW's response.
cult classic: "I would greet them, give my name and ask what they're visit was concerning."
Any chance you're from the Southern U.S.? Just a guess. The graciousness of Southerners never ceases to amaze me.
BTW, that's probably how I would ACTUALLY respond if a JW who didn't know me actually did knock on my door. I'm polite to a fault IRL. My wife and I like to make snarky comments with the Mute button on while listening to the KH announcements.
MrFreeze: "Funny, I've lived in my new neighborhood for three months now and have not seen one single JW"
Maybe that's because someone like me has your territory checked out.
coco: "Coco seeks improvement".
You don't still knock on doors do you?
Billy: "...Sparlock"
Good one.
om
my wife and i call in to the cbs/tms/sm once or twice a month and only listen to the announcements.
last week the announcements included a demo of a jw woman trying to peddle mags to a female householder.
her intro went like this:.
LOL @ ammo & goshawk!
Good point. However, this demo was between two females and I'm assuming there wasn't any lesbian chemistry involved.
So, revising the OP just a smidge, if a JW who's about your age and is not sexually attractive to you, were to knock on your door and ask you your name, how would you take it?
om
